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==website==
==website==
<s>[https://www.kimchaeyoung.com/ kimchaeyoung.com]</s> (I did not pay for the domain so it's down atm)
[https://www.chae0.org/ chae0.org]


==self-portrait==
==self-portrait==
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[[File:Research-station-artpractice-drawing.jpg|800px|center|I made this drawing during research station skill]]
[[File:Research-station-artpractice-drawing.jpg|800px|center|I made this drawing during research station skill]]
==Padliography (Thank you Kamo)==
*[[CMS() Project]]
*
=AFSAR=
[[AFSAR Study: ✶⁺collective investigation on intimacy, translation, publishing, and ...✶⁺]]
=XPUB2 Log=
==[https://pzwiki.wdka.nl/mediadesign/User:Chae0/Final_presentation final(?)-presentation]==
==[[semester 4]]==
Form tag / FLASK / API /
Invitation / sharing
Sharing what? The purpose of the sharing and inviting others?
ETC / list / enumerate: to name things one after another in a list / litless(힘이 없는, 무기력한-> 리스트 없음이 무기력한, 힘이 없는이라는 뜻이라는게 너무 웃기고 재미있어-> 리스트를 만들기 좋아하는 나.. 이것에 대한 코멘터리일 수 있을까?) / web-to-print / read between the lines, between the lines / line - draw the line 선 긋다. / drawing and writing, 네이버 사전에서 단어 글자를 그릴 수 있는 부분이 있는 것. / thin air / 일기장에 적었던 무거운 공기, 적대적 공기, 말할 수 없는 어떤 분위기 - pressure - 바람 / Dear Science and Other Stories, FOOTNOTES(BOOKS AND PAPERS SCATTERED ABOUT THE FLOOR) / affect (1. 영향을 미치다, ''2. 사람이나 신체부위에 발생하다, 침범하다, 병이 나게 하다.'' 3. 강한 정서적 충격을 주다. 깊은 슬픔을 유발하다 4. 감정이나 생각을 가장하다 꾸미다)
==semester 5==
[[semester 5 - chae research log]]
==semester 6==
[[Semester 6 - chae research log]]


=Special Issue Log=
=Special Issue Log=
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*Writing Weekly - with Kimberley
*Writing Weekly - with Kimberley


=keywords? gestures? images?=
=List of intimate methodolgies=
==actions (verbs)==
{| class="wikitable sortable"
===Invite to be intimate===
|+ This is a list of gestures or moments I find quite intimate. Some gestures or moments are not so intimate but more of my personal obsession... But let's see how it goes! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Leaning towards inviting and creating intimacy
And also, this is the list of experiments that I need to do (or that has been done) for this trimester(5-6 trimester)
|-
! title !! description !! To-dos/reference/image !! value: closeness(approchable?)-density(noise?)-feeling(affect?) - distribution? !! Tags (intimate story / intimate technology etc)  
|-
| [https://hub.xpub.nl/soupboat/constr/magical-button/ magical button]✅ || a workshop outcome with Raphael. We all need to come up with a constraint, and mine was only use lines of a drawing of Mamang ||
# <small>배경 jpg이미지 너무 큼. 파일 줄여야됨 현재 로딩 시간이 너무 걸림</small>
# <small>컨택스트를 설명할 수 있는 텍스트 필요함</small>
# <small>media query필요함. 스마트폰으로는 접근하기 어렵게 하거나 landscape으로 보라고 하거나 알림을 내보내야됨.</small>
|| - happens in your device/ the size of the image and the awkward position of the image make intimate
- high on noise (lines are also scanned and pixelated)


==sharing==
- gives you fuzzy feeling & makes you smile  ||  mamang web drawing intimate technology?
"Sharing, therefore, is not understood as an act of disclosure but instead of signals collaboration and collaborative ways to enact and engender struggle." [Dear Science, Curiosities, Katherine McKittrick]<br>
|-
sharing your [[User:Chae0#Drawing / Illustration / Annotation | note]] as an act of care
| lost stories
| For the 3rd public moment, I did a performance to read a letter to Mamang, a puppy doll I lost. Then I invited people to share their lost stories.  ||
# <small>사람들 그림 스캔 한 뒤에 파일 모두 정돈하기</small>
# <small>해당 라인들을 가지고 여러 그림들 만들기</small>
# <small>어떤 이미지 위에 얹을 것인지 결정하기</small>
# <small>어떤 텍스트와 함께 제시할 것인지 정하기</small>
| - reading the letter was crucial to set the mood
-makes you sentimental/sad
| tiny / intimate story and medium
|-
| smart textile || if you press the soft button, the LED light will be on ||
* https://stationskills.mywdka.nl/?p=6245
* https://interactionstation.wdka.hro.nl/wiki/Main_Page
| Example || Example
|-
| whispering - bread / bread-mic
| Example ||
# Leeszaal 녹음 파일 다시 듣기, 반응들 담기
# 녹음기를 넣어도 같은 효과가 나는지. 더운 김, 입김이 중요한 것인지
| the bread was super interesting because it has a really nice acoustic effect. I shared the story of the ugly side of me which was quite nice || food - soft and squishy - intimate story and medium
|-
| whispering - computer
| during the Monday morning sesh, for Miri, I whispered to a computer || what was it about? why this moment was special? || - silly and absurd, mixing different tools together (rolled paper tube - computer mic and camera - jitsi)
- acoustically intimate, you are surrounded by ppl yet creating a moment
| whisper / quick / hardware(computer-headphone-rolled paper) / software(jitsi) / rolled paper
|-
| QR code (quick response code) butterfly
| 나비의 펄럭임을 따라 움직이는 눈 그리고 QR코드를 스캔하기 위해 코드를 따라 움직이는 카메라. || <small>큐알코드의 원리를 설명해 놓은 웹사이트:</small>
<small>https://freemoa-blog.com/979
결국 큐알코드도 명도-contrast를 이용한 기술 그리고 기존 바코드가 적은 양의 정보만을 담을 수 있었던 것을 보완하기 위해 계발된 것.</small>


===Blowing candles|dandelions|feathers|and hot tea===
<small>원본 데이터의 30% 이내 까지만 변형해야된다고 함.</small>
한 템포 쉬고 나아가는 그 스텝이 좋은 것 같아. 물론 무엇을 부느냐에 따라 바람에 대한 반응(깃털의 흩날림, 민들레씨의 퍼짐)도 재미있지만.


===Drawing / Illustration / Annotation===
<small>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/QR_code</small>
*a thought relates to annotation: https://pad.xpub.nl/p/writing-points-chae (wip)
*post-card making


===highlight===
<small>23-01-2023 : tested with regular A4 paper. 사이즈에 따라 무게감이 달라져서 움직임과 쳐지는 정도에 영향을 줌. 5mm 큐알코드도 요즘 카메라는 인식 가능함, 큐알코드를 늘려도 인식가능하지만 일정정도 이상 늘리는 것은 안됨. '''gif의 느낌을 줄 수 있을듯, 아니면 스톱모션이나 애니메이션 가능할듯''', 소리가 상당히 큼, 육안으로 보는 것과 카메라 화면을 통해 보는 것 간의 묘한 차이가 있음. (이것도 어쩌면 whispering-computer 처럼 "나-튜브-컴퓨터-jitsi-미리엄-헤드폰"과 같이 qr을 인식하는 카메라, , 움직이는 나비 그리고 큐알이 담고 있는 landing page)</small>
*Sparkling of the sun on different surfaces
**햇빛가루
*highlighting the text / deleting the text - with Gersande, Nested Narrative
**eco-lighter from 3rd semester, Radio Implicancies, making notes and reading excerpts


===Licking the edge of the envelope | stamp===
# <small>나비 몸통 자체도 3d프린팅 하기, 모터를 감싸는 몸체도</small>
licking the thin paper, edge with your chunky tongue is quite funny and intimate<br>
# <small>QR code를 다른 식으로 변형하고 해킹하는 방법?</small>
edible glue→ tongues that follow the lines, colored tongues
# <small>나비 몸에 이것저것 다는 것, 소리도 나게</small>
# <small>휴지로 테스트해보기 (탄성을 가지고 테스트하기)</small>
# Thaumatrope https://youtu.be/VmBGD-L-Jn4
# https://www.itsnicethat.com/articles/akiyoshis-illusion-pages
| silly movement, absurdity=> makes you laugh || 펄럭거림 - flutter
|-
| cute laser beam || Example ||
# <small>레이저빔 구매 (완료), 아크릴 거울 구매 - xpub에 있는 것 그냥 쓰기</small>
# <small>모터와 연동해서 테스트</small>
# <small>일단 abstract모양에서 시작해서 어떻게하면 레이저빔의 공격적 느낌을 전복시킬 수 있을지 연구</small>
<small>'''References:'''</small>


===whispering===
<small>[https://youtu.be/62p9u7XjawQ<nowiki> Glow in the dark Laser pointers Experiment]</nowiki></small>


==state (adjective)==
<small>mini smoke machine and the mini laser</small>
===Cuteness===
Maybe cuteness is not the best way to wrap up my practice...! Still need to think about it.


===Elements Of Surprise===
| Example || subverting the aggressiveness
flatness occupying the space, 2D->3D
|-
playing with and twisting one's expectation
| tree-like-headphones
| connect multiple audio splitters and people can bring their headphones, earphones to participate. Or they can also share their one earphone to strangers or their friends. ||
# <small><s>audio splitter 구매</s></small>
# <small><s>연결해서 테스트</s> (I tested during the 2nd check-in assessment)</small>
# <small>'''다른 오디오 장치들을 믹싱할 수 있는지 테스트'''</small>
# <small>몇개까지 연결할 수 있는지, installation에서 어떤 것을 재미있게 가지고 놀 수 있을지</small>
| maybe the volume could be turned up.
같이 둘러앉고, 헤드폰 비어 있는 곳을 꽂고, 나눠 끼우고 그런 순간들이 굉장히 좋았어. 같이 허밍하는 순간도 좋았고(하지만 내가 먼저 시작했어야 됐지. '''그러니 다른 cheecky 혹은 아주 작은, shy한 사람들도 할 수 있는, 아주 크지 않은 제스처, 헤드폰 끼고 있는 사람들끼리만 알아볼 수 있는 그런 시그널을 정하는 것도 좋을 것 같아->뭔가가 일어나는구나, 궁금하다 라는 생각이 들수있게끔 + 참여하는 사람들에게 약간의 동질감을 줄 수 있도록 하는)''', 이 방법론은 여러 사람이 있어야지 더 좋을 것 같긴 해. 여러 사람이 부대끼면서 엉키고, 같이 들으면서 눈짓을 주고 받고 그런 상황말이지. 웃음이 터진 포인트들은 maybe not 이 부분 ㅋㅋ 사실 너무 리니어하게 하나의 출발점이 부각되는 것 같아서(계보학적인 느낌이 드나 싶어서) 걱정했는데, 음 내 목소리에서 시작되는 것이기때문에 자연스럽기도 했고 크게 부각되지 않기도 했어. 생각보다 스크립트의 존재를 굉장히 크게 인식했던 것 같아. 왜냐면 내가 실시간으로 스크롤하기도 했었고, 어떤 친구들의 헤드폰은 너무 소리가 작기도 했었고. 아 또 블루투스가 아닌 유선 헤드폰 유선 이어폰을 찾는게 너무 어려워서 웃겼어 (obsolete devices)
| clumy / clunky / links and wires
|-
| velcro || For the crunchy project, this material would be PERFECT.
I love that velcro is just so... easy and quick.
| Example || Example || Example
|-
| [https://git.xpub.nl/chae/lost_stories svg drawing pad] || Example || <small><nowiki>23-01-2023: 조셉이 도와줘서 현재 페이지가 3개이고, id를 생성하는 것까지는 되었음. 그리고 svg의 좌표들을 저장하는 것까지 되었고. 다만 이제 html 링크에 있는 생성된 아이디를 그 다음 페이지로 넘긴 뒤에 그 아이디 이름으로 생성된 database 파일에 svg 좌표를 저장하는 단계가 필요함. 그것이 된다면 이제 데이터 베이스에는 [잃어버린 대상, 잃어버린 경황, 드로잉 좌표]이 저장되게 되고, 이후 해당 정보들을 불러와서 바꿀 수 있게 됨.</nowiki></small>|| Example || Example
|-
| blowing - candle || Example || Example || Example || Example
|-
| blowing - feather || Example || Example || Example || Example
|-
| scanned child drawing sticker in telegram || Example || Example || high on noise. 컴퓨터 화면에서 찌직거리는 선의 느낌을 볼 수 있는게 || Example
|-
| licking - the tip of the envelope || Example || Example || different way of approaching the world (fumble with ) || fragile - can be dangerous
|-
| licking - the stamp || Example || Example || Example || Example 
|-
| fluffy - socks (수면양말 원단) || Example || example || Example || Example 
|-
| artificial tears || Example || https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Artificial_tears || - the liquid being absorbed by and part of your body || fragile - can be dangerous
|-
| margin - making  notes - diary - blog - chatty || 일기장에 적힌 것을 우연히 보게 될 때나, 손편지가 주는 느낌, || Example || personality - high on noise as well? || tiny - personal space/public space - personality - unique - personal thought expressed in readable text
|-
| pockets || pockets attatched to apparllel || [https://awards.visitcenter.org/awards2016/editors_choice/index.php?gallery=second_place# Preschool Pocket Trasures by Melissa Kaseman] || Example || tiny, small -personal space - hidden - soft - warmth
|-
| whisper - string telephone || with a string telephone technique, you can talk with someone far. Also if you put an audio player in the telephone, one can hear it with some  ||
# 설치 테스트해보기 - 공간 이곳 저곳에 설치해둔다면?
| - accessible, you just need two cups and a string
- high on noise


===flatness===
- childhood memory -> makes you sentimental || create the personal space 
번데기에서 나온 나비의 날개는 착착 접힌 낙하산처럼, 쭈글쭈글 구겨진 편지처럼 뭉쳐 있었다. 녀석들이 번데기에서 나오는 모습을 내 눈으로 보고서도 그렇게 큰 날개가 그렇게 좁은 공간에 담겨 있다는 사실이 믿기지 않았다. 갓 우화한 나비는 몸통이 뚜렷이 눈에 들어왔다. 일단 날개가 펼쳐져서 그 생명체를 압도하게 되면 이후에는 다시 볼 수 없는 모습이었다. 그 짧은 순간 나비는 꼭 벌레처럼, 곤충처럼 보였다. 감각을 느낄 줄 아는 꽃의 사촌인 양 화려한 날개로만 보이는 나중의 모습과는 달랐다. '''몸통은 우화 후 몇 분 안에 날개로 펌프질해 넣어서 날개를 날기에 알맞은 평면으로 펼쳐내는 데 쓸 체액을 머금고 있기 때문에 아직 통통했다. 나비들이 각자의 번데기에 달라붙어 있는 동안, 그들의 날개가 거의 알아차릴 수 없을 만큼 서서히 펼쳐졌다.''' 번데기에서 완전히 빠져나오지 못해서 날개가 영영 다 펼쳐지지 않는 녀석도 있었다. [Rebecca Solnit, A field guide to getting lost]
|-
| scanned book || my friend Illegally scanned the whole book, Dictee. || Example || high on noise || Example
|-
| petting - raspberry || Example ||
# ask Joseph how to
| smooth and tactile || Example
|-
| letter (손편지) || Example || Example || Example || Example 
|-
| secret word || (서로 시간을 보내면서 만들어진 둘만의/그룹 내의 언어) || maybe check Amy Suo Wu's Work || - closeness coming from time you spent together || language - code- secret
|-
| fog - steam - warm tea - humidifier(velvety vapor) || That Distant Future When We Share a Coffee (2020-2021) || Example || Example || Example
|-
| blowing - bubble || Example || Example || Example || Example
|-
| small box || 시카고에서부터 작은 상자들을 엄청 좋아했는데, 주머니와 마찬가지로 안에 든 내용물을 볼 수 없어서 그런가? || Example || Example || Example
|-
| DIY circuit || also closely relates to smart textiles. When [[Semester_5_-_chae_research_log#kimchi_making_with_Jian_/_her_thoughts_on_awkward-clumsy_tools_which_make_you_think|Jian demonstrated]] the ghost file circuit for the zine camp or when she grabbed my hand and our bodies worked as conductors and resisters. || Example || Example || Example
|-
| bulletin board-like-webpage (ETC Protal to Contamination) || Example || list as a situation, an interesting way of using <form>, because normally when you think of survey or form, inputs are gathered, separated, analyzed and not really visible. || Example || Example
|-
| Example || Example || Example || Example || Example
|-
| Example || Example || Example || Example || Example 
|}


===margin===
Leaving enough margins to allow readers to annotate.<br>
marginalized


==materiality==
[[Materials]]<br>
what kind of mood does each material give you?
==time / temporality==
attachment doll<br>
애착 인형 = 사실은 시간과 기억에 대한 애착이 아닐까?<br>
애착 이형에 대한 작업은 사라 아흐메드의 행복의 약속: 불행한 자들을 위한 문화 비평을 읽으면서 디벨롭시킬 것.<br>
*https://www.vox.com/2015/8/10/9049687/childhood-blanket-transition
한나 아렌트는 이를 다음과 같이 설명한다. "약속이란 미래를 규제하는 인간만의 독특한 방식으로, 인간적으로 가능한 한에서 미래를 예측 가능하고 신뢰할 수 있는 것으로 만든다."
=topic pantry=
I don't know which method would be suitable for my wiki page: Have this tagging underneath?; Or having keywords on my main page so that I can always refer to things that I'm interested in? Hmm. Need some time to think about it and clean things up.<br>
[[cuteness]] | [[elements of surprise]] | [[gaining trust]] |  [[Hiccups]] | [[mosquitos]] | [[pockets]] | [[walking]] | harry potter qr code butterflies | butterfly | attachment doll | noise cancelling | flatness | emoticons | hands | 손톱 먹은 쥐 이야기, 지하철에서 봤었던 인조 손톱을 붙이는 한 여성, 지하철에 떨어진 인조 손톱


[[File:Yes?.gif|thumb|Yes?, gif, 2020]]
[[File:Yes?.gif|thumb|Yes?, gif, 2020]]
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  (...)To put it simply, solving crimes often involves surveying and marking black and/or impoverished geographies and claiming that this is not profiling because places, rather than people, are being targeted. In other words, social problems are resolved through producing calculations, equations, and problem-solving operations; these problems (black people) are translated into cartographically itemized racial codes. Part of our task, then, is to notice how algorithms have a place and take place and produce place and how blackness--where we know from--understands and reorders these geographies. I also focus on geography to dislodge crude identity politics, to cast the net beyond the individual and to emphasize that where we know from--rather than what we already know about seemingly authentic selves--is a more generous and difficult political project that takes into account interhuman geographies. (...) With this in mind, I suture a black sense of place to these mathematics and problem-solving practices in order to unthink the violence that often accompanies the production of space. (...) The work and process of the coding conceals a long biocentric statistical history that continues to define "traits"--out genetic characteristics--as variables. A variable is a symbol that represents a quantity in a mathematical expression. What unfolds are measurable numbers--often abstracted from human input--calculating resolutions that we care about. /n If we understand algorithms in this vein, we can begin to tease out how numbers and mathematical equations are tied to a biocentric system if knowledge. What becomes increasingly clear, then, '''is not simply that the results and answers racist''' (e.g., your traits mathematically result in your incarceration), '''but that the work of administrating algorithms (e.g., what we do to solve the problems that we care about) requires biocentric methods and methodologies that can only produce dehumanizing mathematical results.'''(...)What comes into clear view, then, is not simply the racist result but the administrative and methodological steps that require racism before they begin to work through and towards the problem. (...) Geography matters because it functions to illuminate how algorithmic answers to our problems--what we care about--are embedded in place. Interestingly, the more we research these connections between geography and algorithms, '''the more we notice how the former, geography, is racially codified.''' Predictive algorithms are not only imitating a racist system, they are refusing an already refused black humanity by marking black geographies predictably criminal. (...) '''Part of our intellectual task, then, is to work out how different kinds and types of texts, voices, and geographies ''relate to each other'' and open up unexpected and surprising ways to talk about liberation, knowledge, and history, race, gender, narrative, and blackness.''' [이 챕터 특히 딸꾹질 / 그리고 phonetree에 대한 수피와의 아이디어랑 관련되어 있음을 강하게 느껴. 왜 그렇게 느끼는지 정리해서 적어둘것 2022.08.01]<br>
  (...)To put it simply, solving crimes often involves surveying and marking black and/or impoverished geographies and claiming that this is not profiling because places, rather than people, are being targeted. In other words, social problems are resolved through producing calculations, equations, and problem-solving operations; these problems (black people) are translated into cartographically itemized racial codes. Part of our task, then, is to notice how algorithms have a place and take place and produce place and how blackness--where we know from--understands and reorders these geographies. I also focus on geography to dislodge crude identity politics, to cast the net beyond the individual and to emphasize that where we know from--rather than what we already know about seemingly authentic selves--is a more generous and difficult political project that takes into account interhuman geographies. (...) With this in mind, I suture a black sense of place to these mathematics and problem-solving practices in order to unthink the violence that often accompanies the production of space. (...) The work and process of the coding conceals a long biocentric statistical history that continues to define "traits"--out genetic characteristics--as variables. A variable is a symbol that represents a quantity in a mathematical expression. What unfolds are measurable numbers--often abstracted from human input--calculating resolutions that we care about. /n If we understand algorithms in this vein, we can begin to tease out how numbers and mathematical equations are tied to a biocentric system if knowledge. What becomes increasingly clear, then, '''is not simply that the results and answers racist''' (e.g., your traits mathematically result in your incarceration), '''but that the work of administrating algorithms (e.g., what we do to solve the problems that we care about) requires biocentric methods and methodologies that can only produce dehumanizing mathematical results.'''(...)What comes into clear view, then, is not simply the racist result but the administrative and methodological steps that require racism before they begin to work through and towards the problem. (...) Geography matters because it functions to illuminate how algorithmic answers to our problems--what we care about--are embedded in place. Interestingly, the more we research these connections between geography and algorithms, '''the more we notice how the former, geography, is racially codified.''' Predictive algorithms are not only imitating a racist system, they are refusing an already refused black humanity by marking black geographies predictably criminal. (...) '''Part of our intellectual task, then, is to work out how different kinds and types of texts, voices, and geographies ''relate to each other'' and open up unexpected and surprising ways to talk about liberation, knowledge, and history, race, gender, narrative, and blackness.''' [이 챕터 특히 딸꾹질 / 그리고 phonetree에 대한 수피와의 아이디어랑 관련되어 있음을 강하게 느껴. 왜 그렇게 느끼는지 정리해서 적어둘것 2022.08.01]<br>
   
   
 
* https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250796516/grime (Jian's recommendation, dystopian, brilliant book)
*''Writing Down The Bones'' by Natalie Goldberg
*''Writing Down The Bones'' by Natalie Goldberg
*Sianne Ngai
* Ngai S. (2007). Ugly feelings. Cambridge, Massachusetts Etc.: Harvard University Press.
*Wendy Chen
* Wendy Chen
*Dictee, Teresa Hakyung Cha
* Dictee, Teresa Hakyung Cha
*Eros in the library
* Eros in the library
* Xpub thesis
* Xpub thesis
* Byron, P. (2022). Digital Media, Friendship and Cultures of Care. Routledge Research in Gender, Sexuality, and Media.
* Ahmed, S. (2004). The Cultural Politics of Emotion. New York: Routledge Taylor & Francis Group.
* Ahmed, S. (2006). Queer phenomenology : orientations, objects, others. Durham: Duke University Press.
* Bhanu Kapil Rider (2001). The Vertical Interrogation of Strangers. Kelsey Street Press.
* Bridle, J. (2022). Ways of being beyond human intelligence. London Allen Lane, An Imprint Of Penguin Books.
* 재난 시대의 정동 - 애동의 가능성과 불가능성, 문강형준
앞에서 얘기한 세월호 참사의 회국인 희생자들에 대한 공적 애도의 부재는 첫번째 한계와 맞닿아 있다. ''''한국인'이 아니기에 한국인으로부터 애도되지 못하는, 죽어서까지 '비가시적' 존재로 남게 되는 외국인 희생자들은 여전히 세월호 애도 국면의 한계다.희생자의 '낭만화' 역시 반복된다. 죽은 고등학생 하나하나를 '기억'하며 박재동 화백의 그림과 함께 이들의 짧은 생을 기술했던 『한겨레』의 「세월호 잊지 않겠습니다」 기획이 그렇다. 이 기획은 기억하지 않으려는 정부에 대항해 '기억의 투쟁'을 실천했던 애도의 정치였지만, 동시에 학생 아닌 희생자들을 비가시적 존재로 배제시켰다. 나아가, 학생들의 삶을 기술하면서 이들 각각을 '착한 아이들'로 묘사하며 희생자들을 '낭만화'했다. 박재동 화백의 그림 속 아이들은 모두 밝게 웃고 있다. 과연 이 아이들이 모두 그렇게 착한 아이들이었을까? 이들이 모두 그렇게 행복했을까? 오히려 대한민국의 망가진 입시교육 속에서 다른 평범한 아이들처럼 이들 역시 조금은 괴물 같은 아이들로 살았던 것은 아닐까? 분노해야 하는 것은, 이들이 착하고 행복한 아이였는데 불행히도 죽었다는 '신화'를 통해서가 아니라 이들이 대한민국 교육 속에서 불행했음에도 행복할 수 있는 기회도 없이 먼저 갔다는 '사실'을 통해서가 아닐까?''' 마치 20세기 초 뉴욕 공장의 여성 노동자들이 근면성실하고 조신한 여성들이어야만 애도될 수 있었던 것처럼, 이들 모두가 착하고 행복하고 꿈이 있는 아이들이어야만 애도될 수 있는 것일까?<br>
=>문득 이 논문을 읽으면서 compassion과 empathy의 차이점?이랄까 그 둘의 관계랄까 그것이 궁금해졌다.<br><br>
What is the difference between empathy and compassion?<br>
Compassion and empathy both refer to a caring response to someone else’s distress. While empathy refers to an active sharing in the emotional experience of the other person, compassion adds to that emotional experience a desire to alleviate the person’s distress. (...) Compassion is a much older word; it’s been part of the language since the 14th century, and comes ultimately from Latin com- and pati, meaning “to bear, suffer.” Empathy is a 20th century coinage modeled on sympathy as a translation of the German Einfühlung (“feeling-in” or “feeling into”). It was first applied in contexts of philosophy, aesthetics, and psychology and continues to have technical use in those fields. [https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/compassion] 
*‌ Zora Neale Hurston's books
* Sylvia Wynter's books


=&others=
=&others=
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<gallery mode="slideshow">
<gallery mode="slideshow">
</gallery>
</gallery>
 
[[Magical Button]]
==Workshop with Raphaël Bastide==
* https://pad.xpub.nl/p/workshop-with-raphael-bastide-day-1
* https://raphaelbastide.com/fragile-forge/
* https://dinakelberman.com/ author of https://dinakelberman.tumblr.com/
* http://all-html.net/ (evan roth)
* Olia lialina http://art.teleportacia.org/
* https://www.are.na/federico-poni/art-www-u_ndl6mro1y
* http://www.likeneveralways.com/ - www.likeneveralways.com/uninspiredminimalistgraphicsandharmonica3D/
* SVG to coordinate (then you can turn it to html elements) https://spotify.github.io/coordinator/ https://evasive.tech/34/
* https://lab.raphaelbastide.com/minutehack/ (CSS RESET: ignore defult style sheet)
 
'''Personal Wiki Link'''<br>
* https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blind_men_and_an_elephant
* https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gelatin (Gelatin)
* https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thickening_agent (roux, potato starch, etc.)
 
One choice but a well-picked choice. If you want to work with the sun and moisture chose either one.<br>
'''Keep it simple.''' That is the way that the project will be strong. Things that ppl can emotionally connect to. '''Get to the core.'''<br>
You are taking digital things to say digital things. There is no friction. There is no contrast.
 
====Questions====
Q1 Which image do you choose?<br>
Q2 How this image will get old and die eventually?<br>
 
Notes:<br>
Depending on which material I chose, it will change how time effects will be different. 예컨대 페인트칠이면 벗겨지는 것일테고, 혹은 녹이 스는 것일테고 아니면 눅눅해지고 잉크가 번지는 것일수도 있겠고, 아니면 시커매지면서 손때가 묻는 것 일수도 있겠고,(마우스 커서 손가락을 또 이용할 수 도 있겠고)
 
====Magical Button (working title)====
*https://hub.xpub.nl/soupboat/constr/magical-button/ (Final Endpoint)
 
<gallery mode="slideshow">
Workshop-doodle-1.jpg
Workshop-doodle-2.jpg
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Workshop-doodle-22.jpg
</gallery>
 
=Link=
*https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1tQ7BAkvkzm4dy918I_VgUjkMyF_D_ryEcom5WkMHuMA/edit?usp=sharing

Latest revision as of 12:09, 3 July 2024

hello ✋ I am Chaeyoung Kim

Chaeyoung Kim (she/her) is an interdisciplinary artist encompassing video, installation, performance and an art educator based in Seoul and Rotterdam. Her work draws on the aesthetics of cuteness such as bright colors, wobbly movements, high-pitched sounds to instigate ‘cute affects’ and encourage social interaction. Her extensive work experience as an art educator has made her aware of how curriculum content and workshops can be useful tools for positively impacting the local community.

website

chae0.org

self-portrait

During the self-study week, Nor organized the workshop called 'Collaboration, Conflict, Consent workshop'. During the workshop, we were asked to make a self-portrait about what excites us and what scares us. ʕʘ‿ʘʔ Also, the drawing underneath is an illustration of how I imagine my practice is or do to people.

I made this drawing during research station skill

Padliography (Thank you Kamo)

AFSAR

AFSAR Study: ✶⁺collective investigation on intimacy, translation, publishing, and ...✶⁺

XPUB2 Log

final(?)-presentation

semester 4

Form tag / FLASK / API / Invitation / sharing Sharing what? The purpose of the sharing and inviting others? ETC / list / enumerate: to name things one after another in a list / litless(힘이 없는, 무기력한-> 리스트 없음이 무기력한, 힘이 없는이라는 뜻이라는게 너무 웃기고 재미있어-> 리스트를 만들기 좋아하는 나.. 이것에 대한 코멘터리일 수 있을까?) / web-to-print / read between the lines, between the lines / line - draw the line 선 긋다. / drawing and writing, 네이버 사전에서 단어 글자를 그릴 수 있는 부분이 있는 것. / thin air / 일기장에 적었던 무거운 공기, 적대적 공기, 말할 수 없는 어떤 분위기 - pressure - 바람 / Dear Science and Other Stories, FOOTNOTES(BOOKS AND PAPERS SCATTERED ABOUT THE FLOOR) / affect (1. 영향을 미치다, 2. 사람이나 신체부위에 발생하다, 침범하다, 병이 나게 하다. 3. 강한 정서적 충격을 주다. 깊은 슬픔을 유발하다 4. 감정이나 생각을 가장하다 꾸미다)

semester 5

semester 5 - chae research log

semester 6

Semester 6 - chae research log

Special Issue Log

SI 16 - Vernacular Language Processing

SI 17 - Productive Play

SI 18 - Radio Implicancies

List of intimate methodolgies

This is a list of gestures or moments I find quite intimate. Some gestures or moments are not so intimate but more of my personal obsession... But let's see how it goes! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ And also, this is the list of experiments that I need to do (or that has been done) for this trimester(5-6 trimester)
title description To-dos/reference/image value: closeness(approchable?)-density(noise?)-feeling(affect?) - distribution? Tags (intimate story / intimate technology etc)
magical button a workshop outcome with Raphael. We all need to come up with a constraint, and mine was only use lines of a drawing of Mamang
  1. 배경 jpg이미지 너무 큼. 파일 줄여야됨 현재 로딩 시간이 너무 걸림
  2. 컨택스트를 설명할 수 있는 텍스트 필요함
  3. media query필요함. 스마트폰으로는 접근하기 어렵게 하거나 landscape으로 보라고 하거나 알림을 내보내야됨.
- happens in your device/ the size of the image and the awkward position of the image make intimate

- high on noise (lines are also scanned and pixelated)

- gives you fuzzy feeling & makes you smile || mamang web drawing intimate technology?

lost stories

For the 3rd public moment, I did a performance to read a letter to Mamang, a puppy doll I lost. Then I invited people to share their lost stories.
  1. 사람들 그림 스캔 한 뒤에 파일 모두 정돈하기
  2. 해당 라인들을 가지고 여러 그림들 만들기
  3. 어떤 이미지 위에 얹을 것인지 결정하기
  4. 어떤 텍스트와 함께 제시할 것인지 정하기
- reading the letter was crucial to set the mood

-makes you sentimental/sad

tiny / intimate story and medium
smart textile if you press the soft button, the LED light will be on Example Example
whispering - bread / bread-mic

Example
  1. Leeszaal 녹음 파일 다시 듣기, 반응들 담기
  2. 녹음기를 넣어도 같은 효과가 나는지. 더운 김, 입김이 중요한 것인지
the bread was super interesting because it has a really nice acoustic effect. I shared the story of the ugly side of me which was quite nice food - soft and squishy - intimate story and medium
whispering - computer

during the Monday morning sesh, for Miri, I whispered to a computer what was it about? why this moment was special? - silly and absurd, mixing different tools together (rolled paper tube - computer mic and camera - jitsi)

- acoustically intimate, you are surrounded by ppl yet creating a moment

whisper / quick / hardware(computer-headphone-rolled paper) / software(jitsi) / rolled paper
QR code (quick response code) butterfly

나비의 펄럭임을 따라 움직이는 눈 그리고 QR코드를 스캔하기 위해 코드를 따라 움직이는 카메라. 큐알코드의 원리를 설명해 놓은 웹사이트:

https://freemoa-blog.com/979 결국 큐알코드도 명도-contrast를 이용한 기술 그리고 기존 바코드가 적은 양의 정보만을 담을 수 있었던 것을 보완하기 위해 계발된 것.

원본 데이터의 30% 이내 까지만 변형해야된다고 함.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/QR_code

23-01-2023 : tested with regular A4 paper. 사이즈에 따라 무게감이 달라져서 움직임과 쳐지는 정도에 영향을 줌. 5mm 큐알코드도 요즘 카메라는 인식 가능함, 큐알코드를 늘려도 인식가능하지만 일정정도 이상 늘리는 것은 안됨. gif의 느낌을 줄 수 있을듯, 아니면 스톱모션이나 애니메이션 가능할듯, 소리가 상당히 큼, 육안으로 보는 것과 카메라 화면을 통해 보는 것 간의 묘한 차이가 있음. (이것도 어쩌면 whispering-computer 처럼 "나-튜브-컴퓨터-jitsi-미리엄-헤드폰"과 같이 qr을 인식하는 카메라, 나, 움직이는 나비 그리고 큐알이 담고 있는 landing page)

  1. 나비 몸통 자체도 3d프린팅 하기, 모터를 감싸는 몸체도
  2. QR code를 다른 식으로 변형하고 해킹하는 방법?
  3. 나비 몸에 이것저것 다는 것, 소리도 나게
  4. 휴지로 테스트해보기 (탄성을 가지고 테스트하기)
  5. Thaumatrope https://youtu.be/VmBGD-L-Jn4
  6. https://www.itsnicethat.com/articles/akiyoshis-illusion-pages
silly movement, absurdity=> makes you laugh 펄럭거림 - flutter
cute laser beam Example
  1. 레이저빔 구매 (완료), 아크릴 거울 구매 - xpub에 있는 것 그냥 쓰기
  2. 모터와 연동해서 테스트
  3. 일단 abstract모양에서 시작해서 어떻게하면 레이저빔의 공격적 느낌을 전복시킬 수 있을지 연구

References:

[https://youtu.be/62p9u7XjawQ Glow in the dark Laser pointers Experiment]

mini smoke machine and the mini laser

Example subverting the aggressiveness
tree-like-headphones

connect multiple audio splitters and people can bring their headphones, earphones to participate. Or they can also share their one earphone to strangers or their friends.
  1. audio splitter 구매
  2. 연결해서 테스트 (I tested during the 2nd check-in assessment)
  3. 다른 오디오 장치들을 믹싱할 수 있는지 테스트
  4. 몇개까지 연결할 수 있는지, installation에서 어떤 것을 재미있게 가지고 놀 수 있을지
maybe the volume could be turned up.

같이 둘러앉고, 헤드폰 비어 있는 곳을 꽂고, 나눠 끼우고 그런 순간들이 굉장히 좋았어. 같이 허밍하는 순간도 좋았고(하지만 내가 먼저 시작했어야 됐지. 그러니 다른 cheecky 혹은 아주 작은, shy한 사람들도 할 수 있는, 아주 크지 않은 제스처, 헤드폰 끼고 있는 사람들끼리만 알아볼 수 있는 그런 시그널을 정하는 것도 좋을 것 같아->뭔가가 일어나는구나, 궁금하다 라는 생각이 들수있게끔 + 참여하는 사람들에게 약간의 동질감을 줄 수 있도록 하는), 이 방법론은 여러 사람이 있어야지 더 좋을 것 같긴 해. 여러 사람이 부대끼면서 엉키고, 같이 들으면서 눈짓을 주고 받고 그런 상황말이지. 웃음이 터진 포인트들은 maybe not 이 부분 ㅋㅋ 사실 너무 리니어하게 하나의 출발점이 부각되는 것 같아서(계보학적인 느낌이 드나 싶어서) 걱정했는데, 음 내 목소리에서 시작되는 것이기때문에 자연스럽기도 했고 크게 부각되지 않기도 했어. 생각보다 스크립트의 존재를 굉장히 크게 인식했던 것 같아. 왜냐면 내가 실시간으로 스크롤하기도 했었고, 어떤 친구들의 헤드폰은 너무 소리가 작기도 했었고. 아 또 블루투스가 아닌 유선 헤드폰 유선 이어폰을 찾는게 너무 어려워서 웃겼어 (obsolete devices)

clumy / clunky / links and wires
velcro For the crunchy project, this material would be PERFECT.

I love that velcro is just so... easy and quick.

Example Example Example
svg drawing pad Example 23-01-2023: 조셉이 도와줘서 현재 페이지가 3개이고, id를 생성하는 것까지는 되었음. 그리고 svg의 좌표들을 저장하는 것까지 되었고. 다만 이제 html 링크에 있는 생성된 아이디를 그 다음 페이지로 넘긴 뒤에 그 아이디 이름으로 생성된 database 파일에 svg 좌표를 저장하는 단계가 필요함. 그것이 된다면 이제 데이터 베이스에는 [잃어버린 대상, 잃어버린 경황, 드로잉 좌표]이 저장되게 되고, 이후 해당 정보들을 불러와서 바꿀 수 있게 됨. Example Example
blowing - candle Example Example Example Example
blowing - feather Example Example Example Example
scanned child drawing sticker in telegram Example Example high on noise. 컴퓨터 화면에서 찌직거리는 선의 느낌을 볼 수 있는게 Example
licking - the tip of the envelope Example Example different way of approaching the world (fumble with ) fragile - can be dangerous
licking - the stamp Example Example Example Example
fluffy - socks (수면양말 원단) Example example Example Example
artificial tears Example https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Artificial_tears - the liquid being absorbed by and part of your body fragile - can be dangerous
margin - making notes - diary - blog - chatty 일기장에 적힌 것을 우연히 보게 될 때나, 손편지가 주는 느낌, Example personality - high on noise as well? tiny - personal space/public space - personality - unique - personal thought expressed in readable text
pockets pockets attatched to apparllel Preschool Pocket Trasures by Melissa Kaseman Example tiny, small -personal space - hidden - soft - warmth
whisper - string telephone with a string telephone technique, you can talk with someone far. Also if you put an audio player in the telephone, one can hear it with some
  1. 설치 테스트해보기 - 공간 이곳 저곳에 설치해둔다면?
- accessible, you just need two cups and a string

- high on noise

- childhood memory -> makes you sentimental || create the personal space

scanned book my friend Illegally scanned the whole book, Dictee. Example high on noise Example
petting - raspberry Example
  1. ask Joseph how to
smooth and tactile Example
letter (손편지) Example Example Example Example
secret word (서로 시간을 보내면서 만들어진 둘만의/그룹 내의 언어) maybe check Amy Suo Wu's Work - closeness coming from time you spent together language - code- secret
fog - steam - warm tea - humidifier(velvety vapor) That Distant Future When We Share a Coffee (2020-2021) Example Example Example
blowing - bubble Example Example Example Example
small box 시카고에서부터 작은 상자들을 엄청 좋아했는데, 주머니와 마찬가지로 안에 든 내용물을 볼 수 없어서 그런가? Example Example Example
DIY circuit also closely relates to smart textiles. When Jian demonstrated the ghost file circuit for the zine camp or when she grabbed my hand and our bodies worked as conductors and resisters. Example Example Example
bulletin board-like-webpage (ETC Protal to Contamination) Example list as a situation, an interesting way of using <form>, because normally when you think of survey or form, inputs are gathered, separated, analyzed and not really visible. Example Example
Example Example Example Example Example
Example Example Example Example Example


Yes?, gif, 2020

Reading List

  • Minor Feelings by Cathy Park Hong
  • Queer Phenomenology: Orientations, Objects, Others by Sara Ahmed
  • The Promise of Happiness by Sara Ahmed
  행복은 우리와 가까운 영역, 우리 주변을 형성하고 있는 세계를 친숙한 것들의 세계로 만드는 데 결정적 역할을 한다. 우리에게 쾌락을 주는 대상들은 우리의 신체적 지평 안에 둥지를 튼다. 우리가 좋아하는 것들likes을 갖게 된다는 것은 우리가 무엇과 같은지 like를 확립하는 일이다. 신체적 지평이란 좋아하는 것들의 지평이다. "우리가 좋아하는 것들"을 가진다는 건 어떤 것들이 우리 주변에 모인다는 뜻이다. 물론, 우리는 새로운 것들과 마주치기도 한다. 새로운 것들에 개방적이라는 것은 우리가 그것들을 우리와 근접한 영역으로 흡수하는 데 개방적이란 뜻이다. 흡수할지 말지는 우리가 마주친 그것을 좋아하느냐에 달려 있다. 좋아하지 않는 것들로부터 우리는 거리를 둔다. 거리두기를 통해 우리는 우리 지평의 가장자리를 확립한다. [사라 아메드 행복의 약속: 불행한 자들을 위한 문화비평, 1장]
  • The Aesthetics and Affects of Cuteness edited by Edited ByJoshua Paul Dale, Joyce Goggin, Julia Leyda, Anthony McIntyre, Diane Negra
  • Dear Science by Katherine McKittrick
Wonder
(...)Dear Science argues that black people have always used interdisciplinary methodologies to explain, explore, and story the world, becuase thinking and writing and imagining across a range of texts, disciplines, histories, and genres unselttles suffocating and dismal and insular racial logics. By employing interdisciplinary methodologies and living interdisciplinary worlds, black people bring together various sources and texts and narratives to challenge racism. Or, black people bring together various sources and texts and narratives not to capture something or someone, but to question the analytical work of capturing, and the desire to capture, something or someone. (...) Within black studies and anticolonial studies, one can observe an ongoing method of gathering multifariously textured tales, narratives, fictions, whispers, songs, grooves. The texture offer one way to challenge the primacy of evidentiary and insular normalcies, because they are allegedly incongruous. In assembling ideas that are seemingly disconnected and uneven (the seabird and the epilogue, the song and the soil, the punch clock and the ecosystem, the streetlight and the kick-on-beat), the logic of knoeing-to-prove is unsustainable because incongruity appears to be offering atypical thinking. Yet curioisity thrives. (...) Also, assembling ideas that are seemingly connected () fuse and break apart how we know, necause we seek out continuities and ruptures. And curiosity thrives. (...) What is meaningful, then, are the ways in which black people are interdisciplinary actors, continually entangling and disentangling varying narratives and tempos and hues that, together, invent and reinvent knowledge.
FOOTNOTES
Black studies engenders, shares, and demands diasporic literacy; black studies theorizes black liberation not through categories (identity) but from the perspective of struggle (struggle is entangled with identities-places-embodiments-infrastructures-narratives-feeling).
THE SMALLEST CELL REMEMBERS A SOUND
If we are committed to anticolonial thought, our starting point must be one of disobedient relationality that always questions, and thus is not beholden to, normative academic logics.(...)The project of making discipline overwhelmingly only gives us two options for the study of black people--to describe racism and resist racism; these options rarely have any noise or curiosity or questions about black life interrupting them. (...) Method-making is the generating and gathering of ideas--across-with0outside-within-against normative disciplines--that seek out liberation within our present system of knowledge. The goal is not to find liberation, but to seek it out.
SOMETHING THAT EXCEEDS ALL EFFORTS TO DEFINITIVELY PIN IT DOWN
(...)The question of stories and storytelling illuminate the method of collaboration. I learned from working with her. I learned from her that sharing stories engenders creative rigorous radical theory. Wait. I learned from her that sharing stories is creative rigorous radical theory. The act of sharing stories is the theory and the methodology. The process is difficult to make sense of in terms of the process and praxis of collaboration as affective possibility. Every time we speak on the telephone, I have my pen in hand, but I do not always use it. We share ideas, and stories, and our histories, and part of this collaboration was her generously sharing ideas that I wrote down because I believed them with all my heart. And lucky for me, she believed me too. (We must believe each other; we must believe the stories we tell one another.) I guess what I am trying to write but cannot pinpoint is that the collaborative aspects of the work allowed us to share ideas in ways that I did not anticipate. The project is, then, not solely text; it is the unpublishable work of conversing over several years and continuing that conversation. I did not expect to be this patient. The conversation is forever and it is forever rewound very fast and then replayed; "The friendship itself, a form of life that cannot be totally capitalized on and is therefore slightly in excess of work as we know it.... Working in friendship could be a way to work outside of productivity demands."
FAILURE(MY HEAD WAS FULL OF <ISTY FUMES OF DOUBT)
(...)To put it simply, solving crimes often involves surveying and marking black and/or impoverished geographies and claiming that this is not profiling because places, rather than people, are being targeted. In other words, social problems are resolved through producing calculations, equations, and problem-solving operations; these problems (black people) are translated into cartographically itemized racial codes. Part of our task, then, is to notice how algorithms have a place and take place and produce place and how blackness--where we know from--understands and reorders these geographies. I also focus on geography to dislodge crude identity politics, to cast the net beyond the individual and to emphasize that where we know from--rather than what we already know about seemingly authentic selves--is a more generous and difficult political project that takes into account interhuman geographies. (...) With this in mind, I suture a black sense of place to these mathematics and problem-solving practices in order to unthink the violence that often accompanies the production of space. (...) The work and process of the coding conceals a long biocentric statistical history that continues to define "traits"--out genetic characteristics--as variables. A variable is a symbol that represents a quantity in a mathematical expression. What unfolds are measurable numbers--often abstracted from human input--calculating resolutions that we care about. /n If we understand algorithms in this vein, we can begin to tease out how numbers and mathematical equations are tied to a biocentric system if knowledge. What becomes increasingly clear, then, is not simply that the results and answers racist (e.g., your traits mathematically result in your incarceration), but that the work of administrating algorithms (e.g., what we do to solve the problems that we care about) requires biocentric methods and methodologies that can only produce dehumanizing mathematical results.(...)What comes into clear view, then, is not simply the racist result but the administrative and methodological steps that require racism before they begin to work through and towards the problem. (...) Geography matters because it functions to illuminate how algorithmic answers to our problems--what we care about--are embedded in place. Interestingly, the more we research these connections between geography and algorithms, the more we notice how the former, geography, is racially codified. Predictive algorithms are not only imitating a racist system, they are refusing an already refused black humanity by marking black geographies predictably criminal. (...) Part of our intellectual task, then, is to work out how different kinds and types of texts, voices, and geographies relate to each other and open up unexpected and surprising ways to talk about liberation, knowledge, and history, race, gender, narrative, and blackness. [이 챕터 특히 딸꾹질 / 그리고 phonetree에 대한 수피와의 아이디어랑 관련되어 있음을 강하게 느껴. 왜 그렇게 느끼는지 정리해서 적어둘것 2022.08.01]
  • https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250796516/grime (Jian's recommendation, dystopian, brilliant book)
  • Writing Down The Bones by Natalie Goldberg
  • Ngai S. (2007). Ugly feelings. Cambridge, Massachusetts Etc.: Harvard University Press.
  • Wendy Chen
  • Dictee, Teresa Hakyung Cha
  • Eros in the library
  • Xpub thesis
  • Byron, P. (2022). Digital Media, Friendship and Cultures of Care. Routledge Research in Gender, Sexuality, and Media.
  • Ahmed, S. (2004). The Cultural Politics of Emotion. New York: Routledge Taylor & Francis Group.
  • Ahmed, S. (2006). Queer phenomenology : orientations, objects, others. Durham: Duke University Press.
  • Bhanu Kapil Rider (2001). The Vertical Interrogation of Strangers. Kelsey Street Press.
  • Bridle, J. (2022). Ways of being beyond human intelligence. London Allen Lane, An Imprint Of Penguin Books.
  • 재난 시대의 정동 - 애동의 가능성과 불가능성, 문강형준
앞에서 얘기한 세월호 참사의 회국인 희생자들에 대한 공적 애도의 부재는 첫번째 한계와 맞닿아 있다. '한국인'이 아니기에 한국인으로부터 애도되지 못하는, 죽어서까지 '비가시적' 존재로 남게 되는 외국인 희생자들은 여전히 세월호 애도 국면의 한계다.희생자의 '낭만화' 역시 반복된다. 죽은 고등학생 하나하나를 '기억'하며 박재동 화백의 그림과 함께 이들의 짧은 생을 기술했던 『한겨레』의 「세월호 잊지 않겠습니다」 기획이 그렇다. 이 기획은 기억하지 않으려는 정부에 대항해 '기억의 투쟁'을 실천했던 애도의 정치였지만, 동시에 학생 아닌 희생자들을 비가시적 존재로 배제시켰다. 나아가, 학생들의 삶을 기술하면서 이들 각각을 '착한 아이들'로 묘사하며 희생자들을 '낭만화'했다. 박재동 화백의 그림 속 아이들은 모두 밝게 웃고 있다. 과연 이 아이들이 모두 그렇게 착한 아이들이었을까? 이들이 모두 그렇게 행복했을까? 오히려 대한민국의 망가진 입시교육 속에서 다른 평범한 아이들처럼 이들 역시 조금은 괴물 같은 아이들로 살았던 것은 아닐까? 분노해야 하는 것은, 이들이 착하고 행복한 아이였는데 불행히도 죽었다는 '신화'를 통해서가 아니라 이들이 대한민국 교육 속에서 불행했음에도 행복할 수 있는 기회도 없이 먼저 갔다는 '사실'을 통해서가 아닐까? 마치 20세기 초 뉴욕 공장의 여성 노동자들이 근면성실하고 조신한 여성들이어야만 애도될 수 있었던 것처럼, 이들 모두가 착하고 행복하고 꿈이 있는 아이들이어야만 애도될 수 있는 것일까?
=>문득 이 논문을 읽으면서 compassion과 empathy의 차이점?이랄까 그 둘의 관계랄까 그것이 궁금해졌다.

What is the difference between empathy and compassion?
Compassion and empathy both refer to a caring response to someone else’s distress. While empathy refers to an active sharing in the emotional experience of the other person, compassion adds to that emotional experience a desire to alleviate the person’s distress. (...) Compassion is a much older word; it’s been part of the language since the 14th century, and comes ultimately from Latin com- and pati, meaning “to bear, suffer.” Empathy is a 20th century coinage modeled on sympathy as a translation of the German Einfühlung (“feeling-in” or “feeling into”). It was first applied in contexts of philosophy, aesthetics, and psychology and continues to have technical use in those fields. [1]
  • ‌ Zora Neale Hurston's books
  • Sylvia Wynter's books

&others

Drawing and Doodle

Dear Science의 Footnote에서 본 것과 같이 나도 드로잉 묶음집에 어울리는 보여주기의 방식을 생각해 볼 것. Loop로 돌리는 것이 나을지. 아니면 격자 형태로 나오게 할 것인지, 아니면 랜덤하게 화면 위에 배치된다든지. 등등... 방학동안 드로잉들 모으고, 스캔하고, 키워드별로 분류하기(일단 모으는게 더 중요할듯).

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