The Hitchhiker's Guide to an Active Archive/Microphone Protocol

Play transition jingle: move_2.mp3

Protocoller: Initiate music protocol.

BACKGROUND MUSIC GOES HERE

Protocoller: Verify stable communication with Ground Control.
Navigator: Checking the Ether...

If the PAD mentions bad audio levels:

Navigator: I'm detecting a negative response from the Ether.
Protocoller: Read the error log.
Navigator: [READS SECTION OF PAD THAT MENTIONS BAD AUDIO LEVELS]

If the PAD doesn't mention bad audio levels:

Navigator: I'm not detecting a negative response... 
Performer: Are we getting any response? Maybe we lost connection all together. Maybe we should try switching channels again. 

Hidden path: if the PAD reacts to this conversation positively
Navigator: Ah, a positive response!
Performer: Phew, that was close!
Protocoller: Commence Content Protocol.
Content Protocol -->

Navigator: I don't know... I'm not reading anything.
Performer: Let's make sure everything is setup correctly, just in case.
Protocoller: Initiate Microphone Protocol.

Protocoller: Step 1. Is the mixer plugged in?
Protocoller: Step 2: Is the phantom power on?
Protocoller: Step 3: Listen to yourself through headphones.
Protocoller: Step 4: Check the cable, in case it's broken.
Protocoller: Step 5: Have you tried turning it off and on again?

Performer: Okay, I think everything is worki--- [IS CUTOFF ABRUPTLY]

SOUND EFFECT GOES HERE

Navigator: What was that?

MORE JUICY NARRATIVE GOES HERE

WORMHOLE-->