Jujube/home

how I have written about this project

In my most recent film project I try to convey the fundamental human need to be accepted. Homesickness, evoked by displacement, is a point of departure.

The project consists of two phases. The first is a performance I did in February, in which I read a wikipedia list of neighborhood names from a place I used to call home. I shed tears as emotions became palpable. After the reading I guided the audience through a meditation back to — however they would define it — their own home.

I am currently in the second phase where I film those who were touched by the performance and showed interest in being subjects in the film. I am meeting each of them individually and discussing the possible shots and storylines based on their own experiences. The method I use is informed by documentary and actor-directed filmmaking (with a broad definition of "actor"). While the project is inspired by personal losses, I believe missing, longing and perhaps catharsis are universal. I want to portray these affects. By weaving together others' stories, I am able to further my exploration into — narratively and visually — how to create empathy through the moving image.

(from a recent application)

notes from a tutorial with David

18.03

Me: The project stems from a feeling, the loss of home, homesickness. [It started with... and I did two shootings with...Then I did a performance in which I...] I am now meeting the people I met through the performance. What I want to shoot depends on each individual and their circumstances. I am trying to create situations in which the individuals do things that start with/surround/lead to that feeling. I am using a documentary method. It starts with my feeling, but it is about the universal human need. What do you think of when you think of home?

David: This seems to open a space for your work. Your previous works seem quite esoteric and it takes the viewers a long time to get in the story. This is quite a shift from your previous works that start from the language, the script. You are now investigating the situation as a metaphor for what you want to express. Try to investigate the activities with the same level of intention as you do with the situations. [Instead of someone talking about drawing, the act of drawing itself is a metaphor.] How do you create a mental link between the portrayal of activities and the metaphor? The activities are part of the story. [Story about a video work from 1996]

Me: In my EYE project I disciplined myself. [Translating a story to a tale, finding the shots according to the geography...] My work is still site-specific. There I had mountains, so I was interacting with them. But here I have people and people become my material. ON LOCATION: I went scouting for the locations, because I wanted to place people. [Shows the image of Kunsthal... see Jujube/sites]

David: You are imposing an image on the situation. The images of the locations themselves are metaphors, but they are different from the activities as metaphors. The images are specific, while what you are doing is abstraction. Rather than showing them the specific place, what is the place you are creating (here's the word, founding)? What space do you want them to enter? How are these activities [carried out] in the space?

Me: All this talk reminds me of the literatures on geography I used to read, especially about cultural geography: the difference between space and place, and how place is made of people and events (and never just a location). And it reminds me of set design in theater, scenography.

David: You never start with a blank slate.

Me: I have been reading Laura Mulvey. My focus from reading the theory is to continue the investigation in cinema as an emphatic medium. I have been trying to clarify between affect, emotion and feeling.

David: Yes, theories strengthen your creation, not justify or reason it.

SEE--> Guido van de Werve, no.14 (Chopin, Alexander the Great, triathlon)

persons

Meetings

+ 13.03 Nicole

+ 18.03 Amy (film date 27.03)

+ 19.03 Jae (film date 07.04)

25.03 Swaantje, Renate

01.04 Luis

08.04 Marichel

? Ratri (remote)

Jae

07.04

picking out postcards

writing postcards in the bare bedroom

+ other

Amy

27.03

2 + 2 hours @ ceramic station

20 min studio b-roll

second shooting TBD

story of friend breaking down into happy tears

fridge?

Mia

18.02

Prep: pick up zoom @ rental.

Shooting after 15:00

Camera: Cem

21.02

Adem Inn

Drawing prompt

Shots:

- enter the space

- order

- choose the table

- lay out materials

- draw

- talk about drawing

Lara

13.02

- getting ready to leave

- elevator

- getting bike

- biking

- parking the bike

- Maastunnel

12.03 RESCHEDULE

- cooking dinner/grocery shopping

- call with karl

- clothing that need fixing on a sewing machine (back in Germany)

- packing/suitcase

development 4: performance

Genesis reconsidered.

Performance:

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Neighborhoods_in_Brooklyn,_New_York_City

See: notes of the performance event

How to stay vulnerable?

Today I stood in front of the easel for some time.

I felt clumsy.

Drawing without knowing the end result, without grasping the form, with only the moment of doing — that is not unlike performance, and perhaps one way to stay vulnerable.

development 3: game

Choose from the deck of cards. This will be your activity. (Criteria for the activity: it must be easy to accomplish at the location or leads to a clear destination.)

Draw something you remember from your home space in silence. When you are done, tell me about it.

Call someone you miss.

Choose a picture from FB/IG posted by someone from home. Tell me about it.

Take to me an eatery with the kind of food you miss. Let's eat something you like.

Take me grocery shopping. What are the ingredients of a dish you miss eating/cooking? Let's eat a meal together.

Take me to a place in this city that reminds you of home.

development 2: floor plan (unrealized)

Tools:

• lead pointer
• lead
• sharpener
• eraser
• architecture scale
• cutting mat
• tracing paper
• drafting dots
• table brush
• soft nib pen (black)

development 1: this is about home and the loss of it

3 people describing their homes.

"You enter. There's the common room. In German it's called [...] Don't you have it? So on the right...etc. etc."

On the screen:

- drawing action of all the floor plans

- dinner set

- pottery

- bike parts..

It comes back to a personal narrative of 452 Park Place. Perhaps I will create a 3D model for that.

For trailer: Lara/Mia

genesis

See scraps from Field Recording program.
1. Write down the names of all the neighborhoods in the/that city.
2. Read. Feel free to pause.

I will never know its entirety. From the first encounter in 2009 to the latest one in 2018, and perhaps once every year and half from now on. I will never know its entirety like I will never know the entirety of life. As I live it.

Bonnie says Cormac doesn't like it anymore.

Elizabeth is becoming a jeweler.

Ana posts about sunset and dreams about Brazil.

Chloé and Hank are married.

Mateo directs theater.

L is still in his PhD until 2020.

Jen's new job remains unknown to me.

Nicole never moved to Berlin, I don't think.

Felipe is divorced now and probably quit his job again.

Corey posts photos of Hawaii sometimes.

Carolyn might have got a new studio share.

Artists: [1]

And the ever-going struggles: [2]

My plates are used by the sculptors, woodworkers and the barber.

Manny, I wonder how the bike is. Have you been on any long rides?

To the stranger who stole the silver bike, I hope you've got you need from it.

There is a box of pottery from Oaxaca somewhere for the next seven years.

Amelia has not written me at all.

Is there snow now?

Is there abundant kale in the cooler and red russet potatoes in the baskets?

Is Mariam still teaching and lighting the palo santo at the end?

The beach is cold now.