LauText

Notes Te

What have you been making?

Project for eye - something behind glass

Visual essay, where maker explores the escape of silverback gorilla in the Rotterdam zoo with a Grindr date that never happens

Both he Bokito story and the Grindr story are true, and fascinating

How did you combine these stories/ compare?

Was difficult, at first unsure

They were seemingly so distant, but both very symbolic

Tried to narrate the story by telling the events and juxtaposing, also using some fiction

Voice over/script written by self

What about the visual elements?

At first both elements stand apart from each other

Images of a zoo, and a human in an empty zoo in the beginning

Images in-between come through that symbolise distant love

Eventually the two stories come together through the use of a human in a gorilla mask climbing in bed. A point where reality doesn’t make sense and things blur in between

The film is a stream of consciousness

Why did you decide to make it this way?

Maker tried to find a form that could express this comparison they are making

Trying to find a way in which they could shift in between images. Playing with fiction and documentary.

Opening room for them to move freely and not just stick to one image or style. It is quite essayistic but also very diverse visually.

Is this different from your previous practice?

Very different for the maker. Maker was previously focused on narrative, dramatic fiction. Didn’t leave room for their own thoughts

Similarly, in documentary, you just focus on reality around you.

This new form was difficult for the maker, to address these topics and place themselves in it, as a personal view

It feels for them like a diary

Previous works for the maker were more of an outcome of a feeling they wanted to express through a story.

What next?

Yes, maker wants to break a bit from the traditional way of how they were trained. This first film was a big first step for that.

The maker wants to make the work more spatial, adding theatrical and performative and interactive elements. Make the space more involved

Maker is really interested in the notion of trauma and the effects it has on people. They have 12 hours of footage from childhood, which motivates this. Childhood was not easy, mother sick

Wants to make a personal but also collective history of trauma.

Additionally, looking at queer and gender oppression, similarities in the trauma and wants tot find these and explore in their work.

Is dealing with heavy topics essential to your work?

Maker has consistently been wrestling with these sensitive issues in their work. Addiction and trauma also

Somehow there has always been a sort of conflict involved whenever they are working. Part of the research for them is going through heartbreak, or trauma. Talking to others is also important, so they don’t feel like so individual in their trouble

Opening conversation helps to understand and motivate artistic exploration

Why do you make?

It always come from first instinct

But there is always a healing component too, for themselves

However it shouldn’t just be therapy for themselves, they also want to have their work be a place of catharsis for others, to heal, find hope or at the very least have a different view. (Ex. No one would ever see the similarity between a gorilla and a Grindr date!)

Also co-creation is important to them, thru performance, input, acting, using real people and their stories as a base to build off (ex. Portrait of sam)

First draft

What have you been making?

My most recent project is the short film 'There's Something Behind Glass'. It's a visual essay that compares a personal story to a news event, in this case a grindr date that never happened and the escape of silverback gorilla Bokito in the Rotterdam zoo. The film is in my opinion a stream of consciousness, since it portrays an associative thought process.

How did you make it?

I found both stories that I tried to combine fascinating and similar in a strange, symbolic way. Trying to blend these texts together in one medium was difficult and I'm still not entirely sure if I totally got it in this version.

I started with creating images that carried certain aspects of the story. Later I wrote and recorded the voice-over which became the fundament for the structure of the film. The next step images with certain parts of the texts. In this voice-over I tell about a personal story while also giving flashbacks about the events surrounding Bokito. In a way I wanted to juxtapose these two happenings in image and sound. Eventually the two stories come together through the use of a human wearing a speedo and a gorilla mask appearing in front of the camera.

Relation to previous practice.

For me working in this personal, essayistic way is different from the work I used to produce. I was primarily focused on documentary and fiction work in a traditional way. Films that represented a certain message in scenes and not directly addressing one’s own thoughts. In this film I have been operating on a more individual level. I used to work with bigger crews and this time I did everything myself, script, camera, edit and sound.

What do you want to make next?

For my next project I’d like to focus more on using the notion of space in my work. A lot of my work has been limited to single screen media, which can be watched from everywhere, from a telephone to a cinema room.

But I have been interested for a long time in creating an ambience with image and sound in a particular space. I’d like to include performance art in these pieces as well. But these ambitions always have to match with the story I’d like to tell next. Sometimes I do switch back to a more classical cinematic work. In my opinion form can be a start, but function determines the end result.

I’d like to use the essaystic form as part of the process again, because it can express similarities and flows of thought in a quick, interesting way.

For my future research I’d like to dive more into topics as generational trauma, addiction and healing. For this I want to use found footage of my own childhood while also researching a broader history of queer oppression and resistance.

Why do you want to make it?

In a way I want my work to be a healing component itself, not only for myself but also the participant that enters the film or work.

Feedback Sam/Te:

'In my opinion', you write it in first person, it sounds a bit redundant. You're the one who makes it. Leave it out and it sounds stronger.
Curious about the Bokito event, it would be nice if you give some more details. How is that important to you. I feel curious to know more. Contextualize that.
The metaphor of glass, more clear. Poetry. Elaborate on this a bit more.
Writing poetry, include more of what is part of my practice.
Include research for Bokito, Stine
Include radical faeries
Similarities thematic wise between Bokito and RELEASE