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== Conversation with Donna Metzlar ==
== Interview with Donna Metzlar ==
Part 1: 16-11-2019
Part 1: 16-11-2019
<br>
<br>
Format: In person meeting
Format: In person meeting, conversation.
<br><br>
<br><br>


Donna Metzlar is involved in many social and political activities. Officially trained as a nurse, she became fascinated with computers and started working as a system administrator. As part of the Genderchangers networks, she has organised a big number of workshops, events and projects, such as the Eclectic Tech Carnival and the Syster Server.  
Donna Metzlar is involved in many social and political activities. Officially trained as a nurse, she became fascinated with computers and started working as a system administrator. She is part of the Genderchangers networks and has organised a big number of workshops, events, and projects, such as the Eclectic Tech Carnival and the Syster Server.


<br>
<br>
[https://pad.xpub.nl/p/Interview_Donna Pad with questions]<br>
[https://pad.xpub.nl/p/Interview_Donna Pad with questions]<br>
Transcription: Work in progress
Transcription: Work in progress<br><br><br>


== Anonymous Testimonials: Gender exclusions in Tech ==
== Anonymous Testimonials: Gender exclusions in Tech-based environments ==
[[File:etc-posts1.png|270px|frameless|right]]
<br>
In October 2019, the 17th Eclectic Tech Carnival took place in Athens. During the event, I organised, together with Angeliki Diakrousi, a memory-sharing session called "xperiences"; a gathering of women and trans, non-binary, intersex persons, active in the tech world. We discussed our experiences as workers in the tech industry and in software development, as contributors in free and open-source movements, as participants in tech meetings, as initiators of alternative inclusive hack communities, as technology researchers in academia and as users of everyday technology.  
In October 2019, the 17th Eclectic Tech Carnival took place in Athens. During the event, I organised, together with Angeliki Diakrousi, a memory-sharing session called "xperiences"; a gathering of women and trans, non-binary, intersex persons, active in the tech world. We discussed our experiences as workers in the tech industry and in software development, as contributors in free and open-source movements, as participants in tech meetings, as initiators of alternative inclusive hack communities, as technology researchers in academia and as users of everyday technology.  


The following texts are the notes we took, documenting our shared stories, memories and anecdotes, related to forms of gender exclusions we have experienced in tech-based environments.  
The following texts are the notes we took, documenting our shared stories, memories and anecdotes, related to forms of gender exclusions we have experienced in tech-based environments. <br><br>
 
----
----
 
<br>
Nogartse
Nogartse


Amateur software developer working in IT company
Amateur software developer working in an IT company.
in the company only 2 women, the rest 18 are male people
In the company we are only 2 women, the rest 18 are male people.
exclusion because of language, amateurism
Exclusions because of language, amateurism.
whatsapp group: they send images/memes for fun
Whatsapp group: they send images/memes for fun
that makes me feel uncomfortable
that makes me feel uncomfortable
vintage porn as gifs
vintage porn as gifs
memes mostly with girls in bikini
memes mostly with girls in bikini
"how is possible this to be their working space"
"How is possible this to be their working space"
Nogartse doesnt reply/talk with them in the chat.
Nogartse doesn't reply/talk with them in the chat.
"How can I express as a person in this group?"
"How can I express as a person in this group?"


Line 33: Line 36:
Enial
Enial


Hackerspace
Hackerspace...
Never managed to participate
I never managed to participate.
Always the assistant
Always the assistant.
in a project i had to document their work
In a project, I had to document their work,
but without being explained
but without being explained.
Can you help me?? Why?
Can you help me?? Why?
Not a collaborative process
Not a collaborative process.
they were never engaging me
They were never engaging me.
we can collaborate with artists but we
We can collaborate with artists but we
are not artists,
are not artists,
so they wanted me to be a mediator with artist
so they wanted me to be a mediator with the artist.
Difficult. The role of the assistant and mediator
Difficult. The role of the assistant and mediator
i was perceived as a woman
I was perceived as a woman.
oh wow, you know how to do this!
Oh wow, you know how to do this!
culture of nerds
Culture of nerds.
i was alone and i wanted to do the project with them
I was alone and I wanted to do the project with them




Porcupine
Porcupine


I'm a software developer
I'm a software developer.
when i finish my master degree and went to have a job  
When I finish my master's degree and went to have a job.
I was looking for a job
I was looking for a job.
There was an event
There was an event
"startup speed dating"
"startup speed dating".
all the startups explain first what they do and what they look for
All the startups explain first what they do and what they look for
I thought this was a professional event
I thought this was a professional event
there was one company that show an slide of a woman in
there was one company that shows a slide of a woman in
underware, and they said
underwear and they said:
we're looking for ppl that knows php and looks like this
we're looking for ppl that knows PHP and looks like this.
"If you look like this: please come talk to us"
"If you look like this: please come talk to us".
i considered to talk with them but i didn't want to spend
I considered to talk with them but I didn't want to spend
my time with that and rather spend time actually for a job
my time with that and rather spend time actually for a job
I still remember how I felt when I saw that
I still remember how I felt when I saw that
it was in switzerland in a famous university.
it was in Switzerland at a famous university.




Line 75: Line 78:
I was not treated not equally
I was not treated not equally
But I never integrated
But I never integrated
The only woman in eight people. THey went double and
The only woman in eight people. They went double and
the percetage was the same
the percentage was the same
2 women and 14 men?
2 women and 14 men?
Because I was an immigrant, younger, woman, and led
Because I was an immigrant, younger, woman, and led
a very different life. It didnt really fit.
a very different life. It didn't really fit.


As a user... the last 15 years I use unisex usernames & avatars,  
As a user... the last 15 years I use unisex usernames & avatars,  
so in a forum-thread-social media, they assume that I am a guy
so in a forum-thread-social media, they assume that I am a guy
When they realize I am a woman,
When they realize I am a woman,
they change the way the speak to me.
they change the way they speak to me.
speaking more with a tone down, but still aggressively
speaking more with a tone down, but still aggressively
& more condescending/patronizing
& more condescending/patronizing
Line 115: Line 118:
we were not paid
we were not paid
Workshops about weapons in the night for women, intersex
Workshops about weapons in the night for women, intersex
We didnt want to do it like a mix, we didn't want to have men
We didn't want to do it like a mix, we didn't want to have men
university said that we were discriminating them
the university said that we were discriminating them
transexual could also not be there - because...
transexual could also not be there - because...
it is there own fight - it is another fight.
it is there own fight - it is another fight.
Line 123: Line 126:
The woman said transexual is another fight
The woman said transexual is another fight
we wanted to make these workshops for the students,
we wanted to make these workshops for the students,
but we didnt want the university to say that
but we didn't want the university to say that
"they" where doing these workshops
"they" were doing these workshops
In the end the workshop wasn't official (?),
In the end, the workshop wasn't official (?),
so we we weren't paid for the workshop, only for the materials.
so we weren't paid for the workshop, only for the materials.




Line 134: Line 137:
I always feel excluded
I always feel excluded
Even in a bar, if they have a technical conversation
Even in a bar, if they have a technical conversation
they dont listen. It's like I'm not there
they don't listen. It's like I'm not there
In jobs, they want to "hire" a woman,
In jobs, they want to "hire" a woman,
but the things I was proposing...
but the things I was proposing...
they were saying --yea yea-- but they didnt do anything
they were saying --yea yea-- but they didn't do anything
there was no onboarding,
there was no onboarding,
so it was hard to get into the workflows
so it was hard to get into the workflows
Line 143: Line 146:
I had a stalker in a physical political space -
I had a stalker in a physical political space -
we were talking about technology
we were talking about technology
I told him I am going in another continent
I told him I am going to another continent
when I arrived there, I didn't feel welcome later I found out,
when I arrived there, I didn't feel welcome later I found out,
the stalker had gone there, and told some stories about me
the stalker had gone there and told some stories about me
I feel they don't understand what they are doing wrong
I feel they don't understand what they are doing wrong
I was tryng to "seem" more masculine.
I was trying to "seem" more masculine.




Line 157: Line 160:
I try to find "other languages
I try to find "other languages
I think is a very serious problem
I think is a very serious problem
even if you havent experienced it yourself
even if you haven't experienced it yourself
I testimony, how computer science men can treat others
I testimony, how computer science men can treat others
male "block"  
male "block"  
They measure the gender.  
They measure gender.  
Masculisation
Masculisation
All my life I try to be more masculine, cause I try to avoid
All the life I try to be more masculine, cause I try to avoid
problems and abuse
problems and abuse
What was considered feminine, was getting me in trouble
What was considered feminine, was getting me in trouble
Its not just one story.
It's not just one story.
The suffering is real
The suffering is real
It affects a lot, it can generate trauma. You need to get
It affects a lot, it can generate trauma. You need to get
imaginative so that you dont try on dying
imaginative so that you don't try on dying
It makes me so mad
It makes me so mad
They dont value good work.
They don't value good work.




Line 181: Line 184:
we have several stories from several projects,
we have several stories from several projects,
as feminists there
as feminists there
In our group we are 2 women and 1 non-binary.
In our group, we are 2 women and 1 non-binary.
The rest are cis male
The rest are cis male
I have a problem with a colleague who acts like a boss
I have a problem with a colleague who acts like a boss
Sounds not serious when you say it, but when you live it,  
Sounds not serious when you say it, but when you live it,  
its violent
it's violent
He has two ways of treating me, depending  
He has two ways of treating me, depending  
if I dress feminine or masculine
if I dress feminine or masculine
He treats men and women differently
He treats men and women differently
either he wants to fuck me, or he wants to beat me,  
either he wants to fuck me, or he wants to beat me,  
either as a buddy, or belittle me
either as a buddy or belittle me
Anyway he treats me as a child, as I am stupid
Anyway he treats me as a child, as I am stupid
When I tell this story, my friends tell me  
When I tell this story, my friends tell me  
"you have to understand where he comes from"
"you have to understand where he comes from"
and i do, everyone has trauma, right?
and I do, everyone has trauma, right?
He had an issue for us to come here
He had an issue for us to come here
One day before we are leaving he ("the boss")  
One day before we are leaving he ("the boss")  
Line 200: Line 203:
why we are going there and doing this (coming here)
why we are going there and doing this (coming here)
I take a breath and reduce myself, saying sorry, explaining
I take a breath and reduce myself, saying sorry, explaining
I'm trying to explain him what we do
I'm trying to explain to him what we do
he maybe feels he is not included here
he maybe feels he is not included here
what he is doing looks like  
what he is doing looks like  
Line 207: Line 210:
without telling us
without telling us
we have a problem because we have different principles
we have a problem because we have different principles
We have different views about the principles
We have different views about the principles<br>
---Have you thought to sue this person?---?
---Have you thought to sue this person? Harassment...---<br>
harassment
He says I have thoughts. I say what kind of thoughts?
he says I have thoughts I say what kind of thoughts,
He answers no, no nothing.<br>
he answers no, no nothing
---It's manipulation---<br>
--it's manipulation--
It's too vague to fit under any legal definition,  
it's too vague to fit under any legal definition,  
anyway I don't think legal action should be taken
anyway I don't think legal action should be taken
The project was horizontal but  
The project was horizontal but  
Line 237: Line 239:


Conference about free software
Conference about free software
he clearly didnt read my arcticle
he clearly didn't read my article
mansplaining my article to me -You are young!.  
mansplaining my article to me -You are young!.  
he said
he said
Line 248: Line 250:


A small fact about a conference
A small fact about a conference
3 years ago at software conference
3 years ago at a software conference
you have a party, you have to wait in a big queue
you have a party, you have to wait in a big queue
a man was asking technical questions because the bar
a man was asking technical questions because of the bar
was only open to conference visitors, You have to be selected
was only open to conference visitors, You have to be selected
When I arrived: -"are you the wife (!) of that person?"
When I arrived: -"are you the wife (!) of that person?"
Line 259: Line 261:
I did my talk, and when it finished, in an informal meeting
I did my talk, and when it finished, in an informal meeting
also with people from the hack lab,
also with people from the hack lab,
speakers asked to other speakers  
speakers asked other speakers  
Did you fall in love with her?
Did you fall in love with her?
The question was "Are you here, because you fell in love? "...
The question was "Are you here because you fell in love? "...
Why do you ask this?
Why do you ask this?
I have nothing to answer in that moment. The other guy
I have nothing to answer at that moment. The other guy
answered really fast
answered really fast
I was not prepared.
I was not prepared.
Line 269: Line 271:


kiki
kiki
We should have a manual, how to answer
We should have a manual, how to answer
colleague - software development
colleague - software development
they way he was commenting was terrible
they way he was commenting was terrible
offensive on github
offensive on Github
I asked : can you be more constructive in your comments
I asked: can you be more constructive in your comments
He says: English is not my native language,
He says: English is not my native language,
I don't know how to speak to ladies...
I don't know how to speak to ladies...
Descrimination can come also from other women
Discrimination can come also from other women
Native english speakers look up
Native English speakers lookup
also discrimination to the global south.
also discrimination to the global south.<br><br><br>
 
== Upcoming Interviews ==
* Mara Karagianni

Latest revision as of 10:56, 28 November 2019

Interview with Donna Metzlar

Part 1: 16-11-2019
Format: In person meeting, conversation.

Donna Metzlar is involved in many social and political activities. Officially trained as a nurse, she became fascinated with computers and started working as a system administrator. She is part of the Genderchangers networks and has organised a big number of workshops, events, and projects, such as the Eclectic Tech Carnival and the Syster Server.


Pad with questions
Transcription: Work in progress


Anonymous Testimonials: Gender exclusions in Tech-based environments

Etc-posts1.png


In October 2019, the 17th Eclectic Tech Carnival took place in Athens. During the event, I organised, together with Angeliki Diakrousi, a memory-sharing session called "xperiences"; a gathering of women and trans, non-binary, intersex persons, active in the tech world. We discussed our experiences as workers in the tech industry and in software development, as contributors in free and open-source movements, as participants in tech meetings, as initiators of alternative inclusive hack communities, as technology researchers in academia and as users of everyday technology.

The following texts are the notes we took, documenting our shared stories, memories and anecdotes, related to forms of gender exclusions we have experienced in tech-based environments.



Nogartse

Amateur software developer working in an IT company. In the company we are only 2 women, the rest 18 are male people. Exclusions because of language, amateurism. Whatsapp group: they send images/memes for fun that makes me feel uncomfortable vintage porn as gifs memes mostly with girls in bikini "How is possible this to be their working space" Nogartse doesn't reply/talk with them in the chat. "How can I express as a person in this group?"


Enial

Hackerspace... I never managed to participate. Always the assistant. In a project, I had to document their work, but without being explained. Can you help me?? Why? Not a collaborative process. They were never engaging me. We can collaborate with artists but we are not artists, so they wanted me to be a mediator with the artist. Difficult. The role of the assistant and mediator I was perceived as a woman. Oh wow, you know how to do this! Culture of nerds. I was alone and I wanted to do the project with them


Porcupine

I'm a software developer. When I finish my master's degree and went to have a job. I was looking for a job. There was an event "startup speed dating". All the startups explain first what they do and what they look for I thought this was a professional event there was one company that shows a slide of a woman in underwear and they said: we're looking for ppl that knows PHP and looks like this. "If you look like this: please come talk to us". I considered to talk with them but I didn't want to spend my time with that and rather spend time actually for a job I still remember how I felt when I saw that it was in Switzerland at a famous university.


Czas

As a worker, I worked as a developer in France I was not treated not equally But I never integrated The only woman in eight people. They went double and the percentage was the same 2 women and 14 men? Because I was an immigrant, younger, woman, and led a very different life. It didn't really fit.

As a user... the last 15 years I use unisex usernames & avatars, so in a forum-thread-social media, they assume that I am a guy When they realize I am a woman, they change the way they speak to me. speaking more with a tone down, but still aggressively & more condescending/patronizing He pm-me while publicly fighting to try to maybe meet? He was also a nationalist. Worst kind of person. I would never want to meet with a person like that.


Anarcoma

One of my first experiences When I started to live in a university in a project about gender and technology, free software I made workshops with different feminists I was an immigrant Being underpaid sign with other people for all the projects They started to make normal contracts to guys, interns got paid for my job they made a little documentary about the project and I was nowhere visible they made me disappear all the feminist group that we were working with all these guys were working with gender and technology.


Gud

Organising a feminist workshop for university we were not paid Workshops about weapons in the night for women, intersex We didn't want to do it like a mix, we didn't want to have men the university said that we were discriminating them transexual could also not be there - because... it is there own fight - it is another fight. The university wanted to say that they "are doing the feminist workshops" The woman said transexual is another fight we wanted to make these workshops for the students, but we didn't want the university to say that "they" were doing these workshops In the end, the workshop wasn't official (?), so we weren't paid for the workshop, only for the materials.


Bob

In every environment, hackerspace, job I always feel excluded Even in a bar, if they have a technical conversation they don't listen. It's like I'm not there In jobs, they want to "hire" a woman, but the things I was proposing... they were saying --yea yea-- but they didn't do anything there was no onboarding, so it was hard to get into the workflows zero communication, zero documentation to help me develop I had a stalker in a physical political space - we were talking about technology I told him I am going to another continent when I arrived there, I didn't feel welcome later I found out, the stalker had gone there and told some stories about me I feel they don't understand what they are doing wrong I was trying to "seem" more masculine.


open discussion

I started to be less kind, authoritative in my speech [to "seem" more masculine and be taken seriously] -I try to find bridges, other languages with a common ground I try to find "other languages I think is a very serious problem even if you haven't experienced it yourself I testimony, how computer science men can treat others male "block" They measure gender. Masculisation All the life I try to be more masculine, cause I try to avoid problems and abuse What was considered feminine, was getting me in trouble It's not just one story. The suffering is real It affects a lot, it can generate trauma. You need to get imaginative so that you don't try on dying It makes me so mad They don't value good work.


ttengam

I am a testimony of 2 people that talked already. I am a computer scientist I'm fine with all pronouns and work with electronic circuits we have several stories from several projects, as feminists there In our group, we are 2 women and 1 non-binary. The rest are cis male I have a problem with a colleague who acts like a boss Sounds not serious when you say it, but when you live it, it's violent He has two ways of treating me, depending if I dress feminine or masculine He treats men and women differently either he wants to fuck me, or he wants to beat me, either as a buddy or belittle me Anyway he treats me as a child, as I am stupid When I tell this story, my friends tell me "you have to understand where he comes from" and I do, everyone has trauma, right? He had an issue for us to come here One day before we are leaving he ("the boss") wrote a long email asking why we are going there and doing this (coming here) I take a breath and reduce myself, saying sorry, explaining I'm trying to explain to him what we do he maybe feels he is not included here what he is doing looks like the initial stage of an abusive relationship He published in the newspaper about the laboratory, without telling us we have a problem because we have different principles We have different views about the principles
---Have you thought to sue this person? Harassment...---
He says I have thoughts. I say what kind of thoughts? He answers no, no nothing.
---It's manipulation---
It's too vague to fit under any legal definition, anyway I don't think legal action should be taken The project was horizontal but now this guy takes all the responsibility.


shara

Mainly male cis people men's playing he stole 15 min of my life we lose so much energy he wanted to brag about his old app I was about to build a period tracking app and this guy listened to my talk and he told me what I should say he was trying to give me "his advice" about how to make the best app Makes me angry.


glas

Conference about free software he clearly didn't read my article mansplaining my article to me -You are young!. he said somebody else - another organiser- asked sorry for the other guy and check if I am ok.


dog

A small fact about a conference 3 years ago at a software conference you have a party, you have to wait in a big queue a man was asking technical questions because of the bar was only open to conference visitors, You have to be selected When I arrived: -"are you the wife (!) of that person?" and I said I am a developer and the guy felt ashamed

During another conference, I invited a guy, conference in a university I did my talk, and when it finished, in an informal meeting also with people from the hack lab, speakers asked other speakers Did you fall in love with her? The question was "Are you here because you fell in love? "... Why do you ask this? I have nothing to answer at that moment. The other guy answered really fast I was not prepared.


kiki

We should have a manual, how to answer colleague - software development they way he was commenting was terrible offensive on Github I asked: can you be more constructive in your comments He says: English is not my native language, I don't know how to speak to ladies... Discrimination can come also from other women Native English speakers lookup also discrimination to the global south.


Upcoming Interviews

  • Mara Karagianni