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TITLE

Cannes' Dirt
Swamp in Cannes

review of Jeff Nichols' MUD movie premiered in Cannes Official competition
and the Cannes Film Festival itself.
By Daniel Szollosi


It happened to me that I have been dropped down in the world's most prestigious film event the legendary Cannes Film Festival. And a badge was hanging around my neck.
Seemed very fancy for my in the first instance until I discovered that there are bronze, silver, gold and Diamond badges out there – I had to settle with my solid uncoloured blackish one. Hierarchy at its best.
My knowledge was shallow about this event. I heard it about once in a year in our national news if by chance I was home by seven o'clock consuming my dinner while my parents were in front of the television. So I know about the red carpet, celebrities, etc.
So what I had is my naiveté: it is the world greatest film festival my optimistic opinion says 'allright, then there must be a certain great value in it!'
And indeed, Cannes is a two faced festival: under the cover certain side competitions have great movies to provide, but the Official Competition forms the face of the festival: A great amount of Hollywood mixed with Las Vegas. There you have it.


The pre-jury who are responsible for the selection sticks to traditions. If someone already have been previously in competitions, they prefer to put him on selection again – do not bully what is working smoothly.
So this is how Nichols' new film made it again into competition. With his previous successful film 'Take shelter' he gained so much respect, that now officially he can do no matter what it will be brilliant.
I watched Mud's second screening. Thank God I was not present at the premiere I can not imagine how would have I survived not to leave right after the movie ends and feel obligated to clap like a clown but actually the audience could not stand clapping for every company logo appeared in on the screen as the prologue of the movie. And obviously: those hundreds of people were not  part of the crew – I would accept if it would have been a crew screening so every company's little bunch give a clap for fun for their team. 
So they just keep clapping and clapping and laughing and enjoying the pre-intro of the film. But what do they clap for actually? Do they clap for celebrating the glorious term 'cinema' or they celebrating themselves: 'OMG, we made it, we are sitting in a screening of Cannes! OMG'
Screamed the teenage girl with a easily recognizable french accent.
I feel the same goes for the wealthier participants of the festival. Allright, outside around the harbour there are thousands of yachts and may a few of them belong to some of the leaders of the industry but the rest must be there because they have a yacht even though they don't belong to the film industry but they do want to show off of course: that is what a yacht is made for!
Then the serious, aged film critics: 'SHHHHHHHH!!!!!! SILENCE!'


describe the plot, the storyline highlighting its lame traditional boring predictable structure
So eventually we could begin watching the movie in perfect conditions: silence with not more than 2600 breathing souls around me in the darkness.
They say a good edit makes impossible to the viewer to count the edits. Well somehow it made me counting. So I could think about a little conspiracy: is it on purpose? maybe a conceptual 'edit counting' art piece?
Why this movie did not take my on this journey to Arkansas rough redneck story?
It exposes honestly the story in the intro of the film just as it is written in the Holy Book of scriptwriting so didactic to make sure nobody miss anything: a bunch of snakes in a hole the two boys passing by even highlighted with a short dialog 'they are deadly!'. And Nichols never miss a chance to repeat.
The guys are in a hurry, always. So when Neckbone's watch is giving an alarm and then he shouts 'shit!' of course Ellis has to add: 'Oh, we gotta go!'
I wonder Jeff might stood up during the premiere turned around and shouted in front of the 2600 people: 'DO YOU GET IT, OR SHALL WE REWIND?! THEY ARE TWO TEENAGE BOYS THEY WENT SOMEWHERE THEY SHOULD NOT GONE TO. YOU KNOW THAT IS WHAT TEENAGE BOYS DO – THEY GO BEYOND THE LIMITS!'


But the storyline is irrelevant because I personally believe there is something called magic in cinema meaning that the story is just one segment of the value it can carry.
A plot can be made out of every story but still even though the plots are usually flat and so reduced that they become shallow and uninteresting but the story, the movie itself can has value.
I can be manipulated, Nolan made an excellent job with the Batman stories.




And do not forget what have been thought to you, Jeff! If you are about to write a scenario you have to wisely choose what to motivation of your characters will be!
Allright, allright...let's see...Mud, he is a mysterious killer under 'wanted'. So he must have a tool to kill, right? Pistol. So not to hassle with this too much stick to the clichés. A pistol is a great, ancient traditional film prop, so let's make this also the motivation to Ellis's friend, Neckbone! Two flies with the same slap.





Reese Witherspoon
But then you figure that is the fundamental mistake a director can do to his actress: to give her a role that is under to her own mental capacities in other words to act a dumb. They can not do it!
Especially not on film when a close up shows their eyes on a forty multiplied twenty square meter screen! Their eyes reveals the actress real IQ points but again I am too naive to believe that someone with that low IQ points like Reese can be in the height of the stars and celebrated.
So the bottom line is actually Nichols is not that dumb as his film is because he managed to avoid to run into the fundamental mistake a director can make! Nope, he did choose the right actress to his character!
Press conference
Journalist: Why did you choose to finish your story with a happy ending?
Nichols: I believe in loveI am happily married, I got children 
And the missing finish line is: World peace! Isn't it?



7 days in Havana
Eric kusturica plays a role of a film director visiting a film festival.
The point of this piece is to express the contradicy, the ambivalence of an event like a film festival.
Everybody is so excited about it except the film director himself.
He is having problems with his wife this journey is right in the middle of their conflict.
He do not care at all about this event he has seen his own movie a thousand times while he was working on it, he even wish to ignore it.
It tells the story of the scenes behind of a film festival and not the one ordered by the film festival.
A real director like Emir Kusturica has a thirst for real life experiences (as Ricard Florida defines the creative class) and rather wearing a nice borrowed toxido he would wear a dirty tank top and flip-flops drink some spirits companied with beers and cigarettes and listen to his drivers trombone solo in a smoky underground jazz bar.

Sacha Baron Cohen appeared in Cannes as his new character, The Dictator. He took a tour around the center of the city on the back of his camel, Osama. When he reached the shore with all the stores such as Bvlgari, Chanel he chose wisely and bought a nice scarf  - for his camel. I am pretty sure he had the idea to use it as toilet paper and perform aim to his camel.



I could imagine 2600 film experts and veterans coming together to experience a movie never seen before.

CONSLUSION
The 'box' of Cannes – its a competition for films made with strict guidelines – such as it must be consumable by the grand public – which I find obviously fusty and boring.
I expected something more dramatic in terms of innovation.
weakness of mainstream films media
overcome the template I need a never before seen template
my expectations vanished

I admit am naive and I have been trained and experienced in smaller scale film festivals like the National Hungarian film week or Titanic film festival, Budapest.
On these smaller scale festivals you run into also a great amount of crap. But in a sense that they have no readable message, they have something irregular. They are unique pieces of crap.
But Nicols' is artificial, it is full of with 'E' component actually you can spot these component and smell them one by one and he did not even tried to hide it! He put them all together in a bowl and the master piece is ready! You could ask – maybe you should mix them together before put it on the table...?
 

it is not by accident the world most famous advertising festival takes place here.

Maybe it is crap! - said Lars von Trier about his movie on the cannes press conference.
I hope I will not be labeled a Nazi just because quoting von Trier.

The critics were so good they even expected to be the winner. Praise the Lord they gave the Palme to Haneke.


What makes the experience ambivalent is that all my friends giving me super round eyes 'Cannes???!!!' but what I actually experienced is to be tiniest fish in the crowd within the badge-owners.



BIBLIOGRAPHY


Nichols, Jeff – MUD, 135 min, american feature film, 2012
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1935179/


Pablo Trapero, Juan Carlos Tabío, Elia Suleiman, Gaspar Noé, Laurent Cantet, Benicio Del ToroPablo Trapero Julio Medem (2012) - 7 días en La Habana / 7 Days in Havana, feature sketch film,
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1797348/

Brooks, Xan (15 May 2012) - The court of Cannes, article appeared in Guardian online

http://www.guardian.co.uk/film/2012/may/15/the-court-of-cannes?INTCMP=SRCH [12 June 2012]

Woody, Allen - Stardust memories, feature film

http://www.arktimes.com/RockCandy/archives/2012/05/30/heres-what-some-critics-had-to-say-about-jeff-nichols-mud


Gray, Spalding (1992) – A monster in a box, 90 mins monologue performance

Flash, flash, flash
why are americans taking photos of americans?

Moscow filmfestival
Micha, why are they throwing me out of the museum?
For imitating royalty.

Csillag, Márton 06.02.2012 – Ezért mész jövőre Cannes-ba / That is why you go to Cannes next year, video riport
http://index.hu/video/2012/06/02/ezert_mesz_jovore_cannes-ba/?s=cannes


Cannes 2012: Sacha Baron Cohen pulls camel stunt The 65th Cannes Film Festival starts with fun
as Sacha Baron Cohen's ego General Aladeen takes a morning stroll on his camel Osama
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/film/cannes-film-festival/9269511/Cannes-2012-Sacha-Baron-Cohen-pulls-camel-stunt.html

Solomons, Jason - Cannes 2012: Mud – review
Matthew McConaughey gives the best performance of his career as a fugitive befriended by two Mississippi boys

http://www.guardian.co.uk/film/2012/may/26/mud-film-review-cannes-matthew-mcconaughey