User:Thijshijsijsjss/Human Parser/About Reflective Spoons

MAMA > You look great today THIJS.
THIJS > Oh.

`Functionality' is a nasty term. It usually comes in two flavors: high and low functioning, seemingly indicating how well someone can operate society. `Seemingly' being the key word here: functionality is not a property of the person -- it reveals little information about one's traits -- but rather a property of judgement: the degree of functionality reveals the values of an environment, and evaluates the matter in which a person is a disruption to that environment. It is a machinal term about how well the manualled person can communicate and live by their manual.

MAMA > Can I give you a hug?
THIJS > Okay. I think so.

A similar axis of measurement is `masking'. However, this term reveals more of a person's traits: the degree of masking entails someone's ability to sense and adapt to an environment, to blend in and suppress their natural tendencies. Some might be doing this often (voluntarily or not), while others rarely (voluntarily or not). Moreover, while often reserved for discourse on neurodiversity, it is a metric that seems more universal. Whereas `functioning' presupposes a system of values, `masking' doesn't: it merely states the ability or tendency to blend into an environment, which is not an evaluation from the environment.

MAMA > This is nice. I’m happy that you’re here.

Close to masking is mirroring: subconsciously adopting behavior and feelings from others. It's a continuous emphatic act that everyone performs to some extent -- parsing on a biological level. However, while for some this is just an act of biology, for others it's an performance of identity.

THIJS > Do you know the song ‘Islands’?
MAMA > [still hugging] What? I don’t think so

However, there is an extent to masking and mirroring, a limit to our ability to fit in. For many, there is only so much `energy' to live `normally'. Be that physical energy, emotional energy, social energy or attentional energy. Fitting in means having to be conscious of that energy and allocating it appropriately. Christine Miserandino developed this into a allegoric framework called `spoon theory' (2003): one starts a day with a certain number of spoons, and every action requires some amount of spoons.

THIJS > I think I want to cry.

I think my spoons are reflective. When I use a spoon, I see someone in it. They resemble me, but they are flipped and mirrored and warped.

References:

• Spoon Theory (2003). The Spoon Theory. [online] Available at: https://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/ [Accessed 6 February 2025].